|
FA GET THEIR MAN IN MAJOR TEA COUP
Paul Jewell will be the next England manager. The Wigan boss will take over from Steve McClaren at the end of the domestic season, after lengthy discussions with the FA concluded this weekend with a pay deal he couldn't refuse.
“We are delighted to announce that Paul has accepted what I can only describe as a very lucrative offer,” said FA Chief executive Brian Barwick unveiling the rotund Scouser at a packed press conference early today. “Paul is a big tea fan, but our original offer of all the tea in China wasn’t enough to persuade him to take on the job. In the end we struck a deal whereby he will get all the tea in China AND a proportion of the tea in India as well”.
This is not the first time that the FA have been forced to push the boat out to get their man. Sven Goran Erickson initially refused to take charge “for neither love nor money”, until the FA arranged for him to be supplied with large enough amounts of both.
The exact size of the Jewell deal remains under wraps, but the figure being quoted is approximately 47% of the tea in India.
“If the figures are true,” writes Sun football correspondent Shaun Custis, “then that’s 147% of tea, which is a large amount even for a keen tea drinker like Paul.”
“I like tea very much,” admitted Jewell at this morning’s press conference. “I wouldn’t have done this job for all the tea in China though as I’m very partial to some of the Indian leaves as well, like Darjeeling for instance.”
The FA will start work with Jewell following Wigan’s inevitable relegation in May. During the coming weeks they expect to arrange McClaren’s pay off, which is expected to run into several hundred crates of Boddington’s.
|
